http://br0ke.tumblr.com

We’ll see how long this lasts, so until then: goodbye wordpress world.

“Purple” by Caroline Calderon / br0ke

When you look into these eyes of mine
I get so weak inside, can’t help but smile, you’re taking me

out of this world
You’re Disneyland magical, incredible, so wonderful
filling my world

Chorus:
With color, with color
you fill my world with color
I’m red and you’re blue
let me mix with you
and tint this world with shades of purple

I know that you are scared to lose me too
but rest assure, I’m always yours, my best friend

Just take my hand
we’ll go on a carpet ride, hold on tight, let’s explore the night
painting the sky

Chorus

If ever you lose your way
just remember I’m here to stay
Forever, I’d travel the ocean for you

Because with color, with color
we love with color
I’m red and you’re blue
let me mix with you
and tint this world with shades of purple

Click here for a free download of “Purple”

This past week I was in Las Vegas to watch my cousin and her dance team perform at the World Hip Hop Championship. Legit Status represented the Philippines. I thought they did an awesome job, they made it to the semifinals.

I’ll never let you sweep me off my feet.

Last week I released my second EP titled “Parina EP.” This project was inspired by living in San Francisco: visiting new places, meeting people, hanging out with good company. It was recorded in my small room in SF so occasionally you’ll be able to hear cars and buses because I live on a busy street. Anyways the tracks on the EP are as listed:

1. Sun and Breeze - A song about how nature reminds me certain things and people.

2. Warrior Womyn – I wrote this song specifically for a skit in USF Kasamahan‘s Barrio Fiesta: Wake Up San Francisco! It’s a song about generations of Filipina womyn and their struggles and sacrifices.

3. Strangers – This song was inspired by an Astronomy class I took a couple of semesters ago. This universe is so big, yet still most of us manage to keep caring about people we don’t even know.

4. In the Summertime – Having fun and enjoying good company is always easy in the summertime. Nuff said.

5. Remember Bataan – I am part of a student group called Student Action for Veterans Equity (SAVE). SAVE is dedicated to serving the Filipino community especially Filipino WWII Veterans and their families. These Veteran@s are still fighting for equality under our US government. For more info about SAVE please click here.

6. Parina (Three, Two, One) - This is a love song to a place that has held great importance to my life and the lives of many of my friends. It’s a place where we can relax, it’s a place to “work”, it’s a place to socialize, it’s ours.

You can read more information about each song at http://br0ke.bandcamp.com. The whole EP is available for download for free although you do have the option of donating money. If you think this EP is worth anything then spare what you can. I’m not expecting to make any money; however, I hope that my music will become more viral.

Here is a live version of the first track “Sun and Breeze.” My friends and I were at Dolores Park in San Francisco, so I decided to record  video.

“Sun and Breeze”

Sun shine through my window
I feel so happy, oh so happy
Sun shine let those seeds grow
let your love vine, your love is divine

Don’t leave me in the dark just yet
Shed light on these eyes before you set

Cool breeze let your air sway me
Travel freely, oh so freely
Cool breeze you put my mind at ease
as you take me, to the edge of the sea

Don’t leave this quiet shore just yet
Just rise and fall instead

Your touch as you explore my skin
it feels so heavenly, oh so heavenly
Your touch as you embrace me
is the sun and breeze that makes me happy

Don’t leave me in this world just yet
let your love sway me instead
ENJOY THE EP! And help me spread the word! Thanks.

]]> http://thebr0ke.wordpress.com/2010/06/26/parina-ep/feed/ 0 Caroline Parina EP http://thebr0ke.wordpress.com/2010/06/13/to-barbecues/ http://thebr0ke.wordpress.com/2010/06/13/to-barbecues/#comments Sun, 13 Jun 2010 18:17:22 +0000 Caroline http://thebr0ke.wordpress.com/?p=111 ]]> To barbecues

To howlin’ till the sun went down

To never backin’ down

To the luchador masks that mask our inhibitions

Inebriated, kicked by das boot

yet still that summer booze

left sunburned skin as red as those infamous cups

as dogs wrapped in goodness entered our systems

as we painted our imaginations on tall walls

with red paint rainin’ down on my sneakers

as I serenaded you with a simple guitar chord

takin’ pictures to capture the essence of our friendships

smokin’ blunts like it was no big deal

endin’ up in downtown traveling on muni’s wheels

We might be faded but our memories don’t fade

We might make mistakes but our quality compensates

Good for us, good for you

Take a sip of this hen and you’ll make it through

this good life, this is our life,

to barbecues.

“Waiting Minus the G”

Half past four and I’ve been waiting at your door
Can’t stand the rain running down like teardrops on my face
Can’t you see that I’m not well?
I wish that I could break your spell

But you’re too close or too far
You say you want me then you ignore my call
You beg for love but it’s not enough
I can’t map you out anymore

Thoughts fall through, too scared to make my move
Why can’t I express these aching feelings inside
Can’t you see that I’m not well?
Are you even aware?

That you’re too close or too far
You say you want me then you ignore my call
You beg for love, but it’s not enough
I can’t map you out anymore

Half past four and I’m done waiting at your door
Can’t stand the fact that I love you and want you back
Can’t you see that I’m not well?
Do you even care?

That you’re too close and too far
You say you want me then you ignore my call
You beg for love, but that’s not enough
I can’t map you out anymore

Some of you may be curious as to how I came up with this title. The story is I was asking one of my friends to play the song “Waitin” by Landon Austin. I said “The song is called ‘Waitin’..minus the g.” And she literally typed in ‘waiting minus the g’ in my iTunes to look for it. So from then on, my friends and I always joked around saying “Minus the G” after words ending with -ing. Doesn’t seem too funny on this blog, but it definitely is to me…just saying…minus the g.

I believe in love. As cliché as that sounds, love is the only thing I am really sure about these days. I live in an apartment filled with love. Filled with people who annoy me, who take care of me, who inspire me, who love me. I go to a school that challenges me, that educates me, that needs me. I live in a world where conflicts like ageism, racism, sexism, and poverty are endless. But I know that even with all those problems, love exists. Love may not dominate the world, but it has definitely has shown its presence. When I look at my friends, when we spend time together, when they pour their souls out to me and I to them, I know I feel loved because love stimulates more than just the five senses. Love creates deep affection or feelings for something or someone. It is an action and attachment that can be both broad and narrow in its capabilities, definition, and power. Love does require some form of compassion and trust. When you love, you are willing to sacrifice. When you love, you are willing to let go.

I believe that love does have its boundaries. Love can die; feelings can change. As much as it may hurt, love is not always reciprocal. We want love for something or someone to last forever but such feelings and affection are not absolute. I have been in relationships where love was lost because people change; but it is no one’s fault. We cannot control love; we cannot buy love. Love exists only because people hate. Like good and evil, love and hate live a dual existence. But no one should ever be denied to feel or even commit to love.

I believe in loving people. Not gender, not sex. Just people. As much as I believe in love as a foundation for all things, sometimes I feel like it is repressed in our society—a society that prides itself in civil rights and equality. Sure we have said yes to women’s rights and no to hate against the LGBTQ. But really, when I look at the media, when I look at television shows, when I look at my own relationships, love becomes restricted to gender. Love and its power get filtered through social constructs and societal expectations. I am tired of my parents hoping that I marry a wholesome Filipino boy. I am tired of holding back emotions. I am tired of being ashamed of who I am and who I love. The nuclear family is still the norm. Heterosexuality is still assumed. As much as I want to believe that society has transcended feelings of hate against homosexuality, there is always a sense of discomfort and taboo in the literature and dialogue presented in my own community. Sayings like “No homo” or “that’s gay” as a replacement for “that’s stupid” are just evidence that society’s image of love, especially intimacy, is repressed. Love becomes surrounded by barriers and definitions. Even when I am with my closest friends, I am too scared to express my full love because I know my raw emotions would make a lot of people uncomfortable.

Who ever decided what love should look like? Should we blame religion? Should we blame tradition?  Should we blame culture? When we are looking for someone to blame, we should also ask ourselves: why do we limit love? Love is beyond the physical; it is an attraction to the mind and it is intimacy with thoughts. My theory of love is that the same deep emotional bond that one might share with a significant other should also be shared with other human beings. Forget your gender and sex and embrace your connections with other people.

I believe that love is repressed. It is a bird living in an iron cage and we as human beings must free love. I ask that we remove these filters we have on our emotions and I call for a revolution of love.